The Good Gamer.

In a comment I posted on Jaded Alt's blog, I feel like I am singing the same tune too often these days. The chorus is: "Players can be mean. Players can be cool. Players can be jackasses too and still make you drool." Wait. That's bad. Anyway.

As I mentioned a few posts back, was working on Zeptepi the "Hooker with a Heart of Gold" Holy Priest. Or, at least that is how she was dressing for awhile:

After a few shots of Lord Something-Or-Other booze...

Now she is in more modest attire:

And yes, back to being a Draenei...

During this transitional phase, when I was trying to learn how to use Healbot (and I swear to GOD if any one of you !*)$%*(*)#(* says ONE WORD about me not knowing how to instinctively use an interface like Healbot I swear I will rip that smug look right off your stupid face and leave nothing but eyebrows and boogers!*). So, my first run through with Healbot was Well of Eternity. And, after listening to Illidan's dialogue for the umpteenth time, it truly is a frigging ETERNITY OF CHEESY SCRIPTS...oh, the hubris of the hero...but, we all know where that got him). The dps was great, tank just dandy, but no one said hello or anything, but okay. Get to the eyeballs, and I'm distracted by a butterfly or something on Healbot and am trying to dodge them but alas, get eaten. Die. The immediate felstorm of nerd rage that befell me was worse than anything that demon could have done:

'HEALER R U BLIND?' (I answer with a simple 'yup')

WTF

I apologize and say that I am trying to get used to a new add-on and am then met with:

'HEALER DOESN'T KNOW WHAT THEY'RE DOING' (I am giving them credit for grammar.)

I answer: 'nope.'

Rez at graveyard, leave party, and hearthstone OUT. (PEACE!)

Now, the thing is, I didn't know what I was doing 100% -- getting used to a new add-on takes some practice. What I am not sure about it is their reaction: Again, I ask, ask, ask: in real life, do you (you nerd rage pendejos) always get perfection? And if you saw it, would you know it, my Philistine friends?

My cross-dressing rogue tells me every time I enter a dungeon it's like driving a car down the highway and trying to be friends with all the drivers around me. It is impossible. And there is usually a collision.

The very next dungeon, got a "good job" from the tank at the end. Night and day.

Now, yesterday, don't know what got into me, but was tanking, and the little druid said she didn't know what to do. Some sweeping maternal instinct or some such nonsense fell over me, and decided this would be a training/teachable moment. I would help them, and offered as such: no matter how many wipes or retries. Of course we got Lady Sylvanas, and that is tough for mediocre players, including me, as I have stepped in her purple goo once or twice. We wipe, and we struggle, but "we" finally got it. Or I should say they did (I already knew what to do, but there is no "i" in team, but there is in wipe?). The rest of the dungeon did not go smoothly, but we did finish. At one point, though, the players who were really struggling thanked me profusely for being patient, declaring that it was like being in "nirvana" to quote their words, to meet a nice, good, and patient player. Later I told Guarf it was almost embarrassing, and a little tiny bit pitiful--are people so desperate in this world to encounter any generosity of spirit that they drop to their knees in gratitude?

Luperci the Swag Paladin

Now, I have run a few things here and there with my new guild, and they are great. But even they sometimes have that 'tone' of a hint of smugness that you cannot dispel from really good players. They know what they're doing, they know what is going on, and they know how to play, and play well. They have crafted a vocation in WoW that must be enjoyable and gratifying. But, the smug smirch is there.

Now, speaking of Healbot, the push to actually try to figure it out came from some good-ol' boy in a PUG who was super sweet and offered to answer any questions I had about it. And here is my point about that: if you want to play in a world where there are more wins than losses, make it so. It is going to mean you have to be patient and friendly with other people. 

And therein lies the rub. 

I must also mention that I am the loneliest Jedi princess in the galaxy because I didn't realize the SWTOR was for PC. I am....a Mac person. I have had a Dell, but it's headed for the heap. Don't start in with me. I am not mentioning this to start a Mac/PC debate. That is as boring as crust. But, what I will say is even the industry experts think that not developing SWTOR for Macs was a bit rushed.  Yesterday morning I brought in my Mac laptop to work -- it was way before I was on the clock, and had a few minutes to do some writing on my personal laptop. The "IT guy who loves me" helped me set it up, and we started talking about his experiences in SW. He nerd-raged for a bit, but then ultimately, blushing, says he loves it. He loves that he doesn't have to talk to anyone but NPCs and can solo play to his heart's content. But even he thought it was lame it wasn't available on Macs. (Wish you could have seen the look on his face when I told him what the number one search words on my blog and in general are about Draenei...adorable dork! Any single dork girls out there want a geeky IT guy with a job? Let Matty know.)

The point is, playing with others is not all it's cracked up to be. Game developers get this. But how this is helping and promoting our cultural sensitivity and social graces, I have some fears. I am praying for some societal backlash, where we take back our worlds, virtual and real, and start having some manners. Even Emily Post, the superlative authority on manners and etiquette, was of the mindset that manners are truly about making others feel comfortable. Simple.

So, don't you forget about me, those who have left to a galaxy far, far away. I'm still here helping the good folks in Azeroth. Actually used my Leap of Faith for an actual game purpose today: DK Tank not standing in Illidan's "male enhancement puddle," and pulled him over so he'd get the buff. See? I'm not so dumb.

*How's that for maturity and grace under pressure?

*Leap of Faith is really for giving down-and-out friends big hugs fast.

Theme song: Tell Me Something Good/Chaka Khan & Rufus

Dear Matty: Little White Lies Edition

Dear Matty,
I have a wonderful friend in Azeroth, who's been good and true to me, dungeon after dungeon, quest after quest. Recently, however, she's been drawing the wrong kind of attention to herself. She has a few level 85s, and when transmogrification came out, had so many fun choices between plate, mail, and cloth. Her most outrageous choice though? The Black Mageweave leggings and halter-top combo. Matty, she looks like a overpriced call-girl. She asks my opinion and I am almost hemorrhaging from biting my tongue. The thing is, I've worked long and hard to build a reputation as 'not one of those girls' in WoW who gets what she wants using feminine "wiles" (the polite way to say it). It's obvious to anyone who plays that romance, sensuality, and RP is part of the world, and it's a fun part, quoting Maude in The Big Lebowski, a 'natural, zesty, enterprise.' But, Matty, I am embarrassed to be seen with her now. I have had to make excuses about not playing with her, and am grateful she's not in my guild so people don't associate us in that way. She's asked for my honest opinion, and I'm really not sure what to say. I know it's all fun and pixels, and doesn't cause any real harm, but it just feels weird.

Signed,
Prude Paladin


Dear Prude:

Get over it. Think of it as a 'morale booster' for the troops. And thank heavens she's not a Tauren.

Love,
Matty

Drabble: Doyle Riders

At evening tide, Haanta dutifully went hunting for blackened dragonscales, as her guild contribution. Stepping through soot and ground obsidian glass phased her none, her own hide toughened and battle-scarred. But this scene of carnage shook her: a gruesome encounter with dragons, feasting on the bodies of Doyle Gryphon Riders and their faithful mounts. She bid Tora to her side, kneeling over one fallen dwarf. Tora obeyed commands of “leave it.” She said a prayer to ease his passing, resolved to slay the dragons and dragonkin. All the dragons’ blood would never bring them back, but no more would fall.

And you thought it was a waste of time.

Cross-dressing rogue sent me this fantastic article: "Level-Up Life: Gaming Can Enhance Your Reality."

Gotta love this quote:

Sophisticated video games have had demonstrable effects on their players. For example, people who frequently play action games often outperform non-gamers on measures of perception and cognition. Other studies have found that intense video game practice improved players’ ability to carry out complex hand-eye coordination tasks and their contrast sensitivity.

When I mentally hit my keybinding of "\" to drop my totems when the going gets rough, and have invisible +++++ signs and throbbing-blue mana pools all over my mental life, I realize it's kind of a Walter Mitty-esque response to the stresses of real life. But those I work with and for should realize, if that tiny, harmless mental image of popping off a maelstrom or dropping a few windshear interrupts is the least of my quirkiness, then let me have my small moments. I know every time I have my blood pressure checked, it's excellent, and haven't had to climb any clock towers to date.

It's worth a read, and if you ever need scientific rationalization on why you should spend time in Azeoroth, all I can say is, "You're welcome."

Drabble: Kolin

Matty wrapped her arms around the bear’s neck, smelling his fur, a mixture of candyfloss, smoke, and ancient forests. “Kolin, I will set you free, but be patient with me, it will be another full moon before…” The bear murmured a gentle growl, letting her know it was all right, that he would be fine. The carnies, by and large, treated him well, albeit without much respect. He sat on his hindquarters, dancing for treats or at any passersbys' command, purgatory of tragic comedic actions. Patience? For her he would wait. He belonged to her, an entrapment of willing souls.

Everything's better with Yog.

We've all been to the fair, but somehow, with the gents from Yogscast narrating, the salty seadogs and beer taste a little better, and the games a bit more fun. Best line "...that guy there was pooed out...."

I am ashamed to admit I did not read the debuff message until yesterday and had been hitting babies all along. What are babies doing popping out of barrels anyway? 

And, I did the numbers, and it looks like I won't be getting my bear this time around--I refuse to spend 10K gold on the last 10-ticket item (the Treatise thingy), and the daily games won't add up to enough. This makes me sad. A sad bear. A sad dancing Darkmoon Faire bear. Haven't fished up my Sea Pony pet either, which took my warlock friend about an hour. I've spent about two, or perhaps more, so far. Over-fishing the oceans is a problem, and the buckets of chum I've caught are starting to smell.

The party is over, for now. Back to a routine, back to reality, back to whatever. If you have an extra Treatise lying about, consider giving it to your favorite enhancement shaman. She really wants that damn bear.

Beso...

Sweet dreams...

What a charming time spent in the world...I can go back to the real world knowing that I made a few dwarfs smile, kissed a few draenei, and hugged a druid, at least one special one. In the real world, I caught up with family and friends, long talks, tears, and laughter. But no one writes great love songs when they're happy, only during break-ups, and pain. So--apologies for the mush. Just wanted to tell you, and you, and you -- you made me happy. And you, too.

Lost keys.

Do you think they may have been confused while looking for Spongebob Squarepants to come to my blog?

Make-Over Project: Zeptepi

 (Messing around with filming-just a clip of Zep chasing after Brother Benjamin, who appears to be confused by her as much as she is by herself.)

Total time played: 16 days +

One of my gifts this year was the promise of some help with my Holy Priest healer character, Zeptepi. But, not being helpless, I did some research, too. Sat myself down with a hot cup of coffee, reviewed spells, talent tree configurations, add-ons, etc. But then I gave up and in a pique decided to change her to a Night Elf female. Instantly regretting it, though, and I miss my Draenei, so when I can grow back my horns in a few days, I will probably change her back. It's the Mage I should have changed to a Night Elf. Pink hair with her red dress would be hot.

Now this post is going to take a detour: originally, the thesis was, "How to be a Holy Priest Healer in 4.3 and Why It Matters," but I cannot support this claim with any real evidence. I am not sure why it matters. Both my tank and healer characters have experienced smacks on tails by exasperated, (some justifiably), and jerk players, and again, my real life job parallels strong leadership, quick-thinking and mental reflexes that few can imagine. But--then I remind myself how damn pretty it is to heal, and how much fun it is to whack on a group of monsters, pulverizing the pixels to mana cookie crumbs.

So-the detour: spending real-life gold, be it changing races, names, appearances, or factions. Guarf recently made the comment about the way I occasionally will change something about a character, and how nice it must be to have that kind of money. He's right, you know. I shouldn't spend any money on those frivolous things. But then in my woman-way rationalized it: this is a hobby, and it's part of the fun of that hobby for me. I don't spend money on shoes (I own a few good pairs of Danskos and they last for years), or purses, or expensive meals out. (The occasional Starbucks is my own personal mana-replenishing indulgence, so back the frick off.) He did share with me he knows of a few ladies who enjoy buying luxury items like shoes and purses, and I told him the reason is because shoes and purses always fit. Seriously, gentlemen, I will reveal as best I can the inner machinations of the female mind to you. But be warned: it can be terrifying.

Anyway, must be a woman thing. When all else fails, get a new hair cut.

From MMOMelting Pot: this will help a lot. See the comment on the two points? Now, I'm sitting there thinking to myself, gee, Veiled Shadows would be cool.  My Shadowfiend will hang out a bit longer, and since I seem to hit the mana-wasting spells like overflowing toilet in a public bathroom, that might be kind of useful. But then, I remembered the "kind of player I am" (read: bad) and decided Desperate Prayer would come in much more useful. The plunger to my toilet, as it were.

It leaves you with 2 points to spend where you will – a few good choices are:

• Veiled Shadows
 at the top of the Shadow tree is a nice utility talent. It reduces your Fade cooldown – nice – but the key element is a reduction in your Shadowfiend cooldown, meaning more mana regen. Particularly useful early on with less mana available.

• Darkness
, also at the top of the Shadow tree, grants up to 3% Haste. Haste is probably the most valuable secondary stat for a Holy priest unless mana is a problem – once you aren’t running out of mana, highly recommended.

• Rapid Renewal
, in the third tier of the Holy tree, should be taken if you find yourself using HoTs a lot – another close-to-mandatory talent.

• Surge of Light
, in the second tier of Holy, is a good talent if you’re having mana problems.

• Desperate Prayer
 is a great “Oh, S—t!” button, particularly if you tend to find yourself standing in the Bad a lot.

If in doubt, Darkness and Rapid Renewal are good choices. If you find you’re having mana problems, swap to Veiled Shadows and Surge of Light.Stats, Reforging and GemsUnlike DPS classes, there is no set best way to gear and reforge – instead, there are a few options, depending on what you most feel you need as a healer.You care most about two stats: Intellect, which boosts your overall healing power, and Spirit, which controls your mana pool and mana regeneration. You should gem and enchant for these two stats.Beyond this, you want enough Haste to get 12.5% haste, as shown on your character sheet, and Mastery is your next most useful stat, above Crit, which is close to useless for Holy priests.Reforging: reforge everything to Spirit until you no longer worry about running out of mana in dungeons. Then, reforge to Haste until you have 12.5%, and after that, reforge to either Mastery for better mana efficiency through a lingering Heal Over Time or Haste to speed up your spells, as you prefer.

Some further helpful research:
http://murlocparliament.com/priest-guides/holy-priest-guide/

So-onward. Real life is blaring, vacation is almost over, and soon it will be time to destroy waking metaphorical monsters instead of pixelized ones. And, get a new hair cut.

Drabble: No hangover.

Warm and Fuzzy All Over!

The empty bottle of Don Carlos tequila, imported from Grizzly Hills, rolled under the chair, landing with a chunky clink. It was made from the rare desert plants of the Badlands, distilled with vulture-hatchling tears and demon smiles. So smooth, crystalline, and deceptive—it was a cold shot with a slow burn. The sound woke up Matty, finding herself feeling—wonderful. She smiled. What a charming way to wake up. Endings mean beginnings, and there was no harm in the transition of the hours. She had bagfuls of fortune, friends, and favors, and the unmarked year: she loved it already. 

Theme song: Party Rock Anthem/LMFAO

I ain't got time for your demo...

Maybe if the Mayans and Nostradamus are right, this will be the way we all go out this year...