Sunday, June 26, 2011

Throwing poo.

No Evil.

It is becoming more and more clear to me.

Leveling Zeptepi the Once But Isn't Anymore Patient and Pure as a Holy spec healer, with a dose of Shadow Priest on the side, through the same dungeon grinds as Luperci the Aggro Junkie, is--an interesting experience.

First of all: Worgens.

I see worgens in my sleep. Thousands of 'I Was A Teenage Werewolves' running around all over the heat and fumes of Outlands. They are everywhere, ubiquitous. I have spent a fortune on flea baths and dog biscuits, and none of them is helping.

In one of those swampy, spelunking Cenarion Expedition dungeons - Slave Pens? Tasty Freeze? The sewage treatment plant of dungeon runs, the tank must have had some fungus in his ears, because I kept politely asking to wait until I could get mana back after a few two or two hundred resurrections of a very squishy warlock. No go.

Not much group awareness, okay, that's fine.

But the kicker was at the last boss, I warned them all that Quagmirran is a bit tricky. He barfs a lot of stuff on players (and I was fresh out of Pepto Bismol), and sure enough - pull, barf, dead. I see those big ol' angel wings and say a lot of bad words. A bit incongruous, I know, a cussing priestess. We wipe - no biggie. It happens. But no one can rez. So we all run back. And that is a long, long damn run. Tank asks for a rez. I tell him, normally it is good manners that if no one can rez, and the healer is dead, all should run back. I had to help a druid find her way, too - getting back in Coilfang isn't intuitive either, and once you swim to the bottom of the sewer pipe, you still have to find your way to the exact instance. I forgot to leave bread crumbs, too. Since the tank chose not to run back with the group, his patience must have been wearing thin. Finally, (huff, puff, blow your house down...) I am standing over his body, about to reach out and HE RELEASED!*

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! My fluffy little worgen puppy tank, don't you know I have weeds to pull and dishes to wash? I just wanted to get Zep to level 64 without a fuss.

(I am having to take deep breaths as I type this.)

He got lost getting back. And asked us all if WE WOULD DIE SO WE COULD RUN BACK TOGETHER.

In a word, the answer is "no."

A hunter, worgen hunter, who joined our group, brought along her monkey.

My own serenity had run out, and I asked if she had another pet.


Only monkeys.

As I am writing this, I am feeling a little ashamed of myself, but just a little bit. I have made so many downright stupid mistakes in this game, things that seem so logical to more experienced players. I guess where the guilt stops, though, is that when I tried to help, tried to make things run smoothly, I was met with impatience and rudeness.

Guildmate came to the rescue. Took me through a quick run through one of the Hellsfire dungeons: got to level 64, two new shiny rings, and am a hair's width from being honored with the good soldiers in Hellsfire.

So I'm glad my off-spec is shadow, because, this little angel is not feeling it today.

*Do the gods get angry when the little squishy humans keep doing stupid things, too? Is there a larger metaphysical question here?

Theme song: Licking Stick/James Brown

Postscript: Bad moments in gaming history

1 comment:

  1. It happened again tonight. Ah, worgens. Going to get you a shock collar and choke chain.


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