Monday, December 26, 2011

Dear Matty: Nerd Rage Makes Baby Jesus Cry Edition

Dear Matty:
I am still learning my chops as a tank, but for the most part, for the average dungeon, I do just fine. I think it's pretty cool that I get the Satchel of Leftover Pixels from Blizzard, and all in all, enjoy tanking. I also have a dps and healer, so I know the fights from different points-of-view. But one thing that still shakes me up is the mean dps pendejo. Today, there was a shadow priest named Agar*** who was doing amazing. In fact, I wrote his name down to look him up on the armory to check out his configurations of glyphs and talents for my own priest, But just like "Ramses is a real douche" in Nacho Libre, this guy turned out to be a real douche, too. One of those eyeballs started to eat his pretty face, and I tried to get it off of him, but his aggro was just too strong. He did have time, however, instead of hitting fade, to type: "Yo, tank, $!K!J@ q12^%&$&*$#!!!" Told him I tried. But he didn't stop. He went full nerd-rage from that point on, how his warrior could do better, and on and on.

Fortunately, a buddy of mine who has a shaman was there and told him in her sweet, southern drawl to "Not act ugly."* We continue on. At the Queen Azshara fight, he continued on during the fight, though all was well, except that at the beginning of the fight the DK left--just left. At that point, I was determined to NOT WIPE, even though we had four players. And we did not. It was epic, truly. But the moment of victory was pissed on by this player, who was still calling me names and berating me. I finally whispered him to stop being such an ass, and replied even angrier. He never once offered any constructive feedback, just a lot of "fail, get off the internet, etc." I had him kicked, and the horse he rode in on. His parting whisper to me was, well, you can imagine, but also added that I could not take "constructive criticism." Apparently, he is not quite aware of what constructive criticism means.

So, Matty, at what point do you think a tank should take being verbally abused or should I have kicked him sooner? How do you not let mean players ruin your game?

Signed,
Leggo My Aggro

Postscript: We did just fine on last boss, but alas, I was still so shaken up, didn't notice my bags were full, and didn't get the trinket that I won. *Sob*

Dear Leggo:
First, I hope by telling your side of the story you got some of that negativity off of your chest. I think in some ways, we all could just relax a bit more in general in Azeroth. I was recently in a dungeon with a very grumpy "you all fail" healer. Why this pleases players and makes them happy, I am not sure. I think this time of year in the Northern Hemisphere is a tense time anyway, and many a young punk player is home on winter break, adding to the foul language pool.

I have come to the epiphany, quite late, I know, that this is the game we play. We play with humans, and many humans are a**holes. Remember the epic feeling of winning the Queen fight with only four players, you being the tank?!?! You must have done something right! My advice to you is practice a 'cleanse' spell on yourself a little sooner - go make someone smile, or watch a funny Youtube video, and imagine it is that player. If anything, have pity on his small heart and soul. He just spent twenty minutes with some nice people, and he didn't realize it.

--M

And, isn't the world a better place that such wondrous creatures inhabit it? 


"I'm not doing this because it's cool, I'm doing this because it's important."

* (That's how southern girls say it when you're being an a**hole - you're acting ugly, because nothing in worse in southern lady culture than to be construed as "ugly." Trust me.)

Postscript: The player in question is from my same realm. Yikes. Better watch my tail.

Theme song: Jane's Addiction/Jane Says
Theme song 2: The Cave/Mumford & Sons

3 comments:

  1. I know, I kept wondering why WoW players were such cretins when I came to that shocking conclusion too. I guess in real life it's just easier to spot and avoid them.

    Watching Skyrim Cat usually cheers me up, it's sad I have to have to bookmarked though as I have to use it that much!

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o4b4dndo1J0

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  2. Blizz did indeed send me the trinket in question, which is very kind of them! It just goes to show, never hurts to ask!

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  3. I sometimes wish I could get into a pet's mind--but then again, what my dog thinks of us sometimes would destroy the fabric of the universe. That is hilarious! Now to go paint myself blue and run around the park. JUST KIDDING!

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