Got skills? Apparently not.

I wish I had better news. I wish I didn't have a teeny-tiny hangover from two big-gulp sized Grey Goose dirty martinis. I wish I had gotten more sleep. What I wanted to report this morning was a surprise, that my latest Ironman project had reached level 15 safe and sound, but alas...not meant to be. 


Hachette and Lapinou, her wolf, had risen the ranks through thick and thin, with one narrow escape in Westfall and otherwise, enjoying a certain amount of pride, and yes, actual enjoyment of trying to figure out what to do in order to make enough coin to even train properly. "She" even took some eggs to market and made some pocket change. And her wolf? A more loyal, spunky, and brave pet one has ever known. Lapinou is a French pet-name which roughly translates to 'little bunny rabbit,' a cute name a parent might affectionately call a child. 

She even defeated Hogger!

Lapinou drags in a few Riverpaws, but all ended well...that time.

Ah, but again, the heroine's hubris is her downfall. With a clown to the left of me, and a joker to the right, she succumbed to the fast-spawning murloc population along the sandy shores of Westfall, and then proceeded to run into countless packs of Riverpaws. Both Hachette and Lapinou were overcome, and there is the health bar depleting faster than hope that gas prices will ever go down. And while I give the report of this latest catastrophe to the sweet joker to my right, he says, "You know, you just don't have to be good at everything in WoW." I can't quite describe his tone, but it was sweet, and caused a minor epiphany on my part. I am not good at anything in WoW! I report this to the clown to my left, in this conversation:

Now, the joker to the right was right. He observed that each time my character dies during an Ironman is when I lose focus. I'm talking, the television is on, and there may be a martini present. He wasn't being mean, not at all, simply stating a truth. And his second observation is also true--as is my friend's. I am a good friend, which is probably why Azeroth has lost some of its flavor of late. Guarf is still doing whatever it is Guarf does. There is a very annoying scroll of resurrection that I refuse to click on due to principles. Finally, I keep resisting the urge to whisper folks looking "to build their raid teams." I just don't want to be yelled at anymore by a 20-something. Go figure. But--again, I am truly blessed. I do have the joker, and the clown (just kidding, guys!) and many others in and out of Azeroth whom I love, adore, and get to hug, with typed words or real arms. And I bet if I ask nicely, I can even get some aspirin for this hangover.

Now -- do I continue with Hachette in regular Ironman (don't you get to die in that one, just none of the other buffs/talents?) or start again? Or, Plan C, just continue with her going full-bore, all the goodies, gold and glory? Not sure where that leave poor Haanta, with another hunter in the house. But there is something to be said for fresh starts, but I'm not sure where the mark is. Maybe I had better figure that out before I do "ready, set." 

For now, au revoir mon cher et être bien, Hachette.

Filed under "S" for Stupid

Skillet blushes...and pretends to read this book

Kharanos, February 26, 2012

Pixie Proppagannapusher, Gnomeregan Gnews

An unknown female Dwarf was recently identified as one "Ironskillet" of Dun Morogh. From all reports, she was a stalwart little paladin, prone to moments of prudishness and dire stupidity. Apparently she was on a mission to use the Viewpoint Equalizer and had successfully shrank five Frostmane Trolls, and defeated their leader, Bartok the Beserker, when she was overcome by greed and stopped to look in a nearby chest for booty and swag. Two Frostmane Trolls attacked her, and unfortunately, her Stoneform was on cooldown. "She tried to run," reported one Mac McGunnystuff, a local Dwarf rifleman, "but, aye, with those squat legs of hers, she couldn'a run too fast." No charges have been brought against the Trolls, as they reported it was in self-defense, and local witnesses confirmed.

She is survived by her Bind-On-Account pet, Gryphon Hatchling.

Skillet grabs a few handfuls of graveyard dirt for luck and protection...

Too scared to try to kill this silver yeti...

Talk about foreshadowing...

DAMMIT!

*heartbreak*

Yes, yes I do.

Not sure I'm cut out for this. I now have to go and clean out her bags, etc. and put her to rest. I asked those around me to give me a moment to myself. Skillet, we hardly knew ya. Next time I'm going with a long-legged Draenei or lithe Elf.

But seriously -- I don't really know if I can handle this emotional trauma. It made me way too cautious to have any fun at all. I love all the parameters of this but that one. But, hey, no more looking in chests. Should have made a clean get-away.

*Postscript: I must admit though, for the first time in a while, I felt that inner "gasp" that I felt when I first started playing. Going to try it again.

Drabble: From the frying pan...

“It's bloody cold here,” Skillet thought. The other Dwarfs, all males as far as she could tell, seemed to relish the perpetual nip in the air. “Aye, as soon as I can, I’m takin’ myself to warmer climes, and enough of this nonsense.” No one seemed to notice how close she sat next to the fire. If nothing else, the Dwarfs knew how to keep the ale flowing, and the fires stoked. A log snapped in pyrotechnic protest. She brushed a cinder off of her sleeve, and moved a bit further back, hearing a loud, cheery laugh from the innkeeper. 

Stats:

Level 7

No Deaths

First-Aid trained

And cold as hell

Bootstraps.

Dangit! Why didn't I read the rules again? 

I was trying to do Psynister's WoW Ironman Challenge on Escarlata, and just read the guidelines again. I realize I already failed because I spent my talent points. Oh, and crud! Started skinning, too. (I cannot leave behind dead animals and monsters...). And here I was, feeling quite clever because I have made it to level fourteen relatively pain-free. Well, no wonder. Our scarlet beauty was already juicing up. Roid-rage is not attractive on an undead girl. Ever watch them dance? They are perpetually at a Grateful Dead* concert, getting their groove on with a spectral Jerry Garcia (rest in peace, Jerry).

I imagine that's Escarlata in her flesh-on-bones days.

And while checking on the progress of Imraith, her Ironsally made it to 85 in whites/greys, and followed the rules...unlike cheater-cheater-Tirisfal-pumpkin eater Escarlata. 

Well, shucks. In for a penny, in for a pound, I guess. Might as well just put her green wand in her pocket, and keep on truckin'.

Theme song: Truckin'/Grateful Dead
*I was never a huge GD fan; however, I have a very good friend who was/is. I never could see "it" -- whatever "it" was she saw. I am sure a dose of hallucinogens would have helped.

True Grit: Psynister's Ironman Challenge

This is a fantastic idea*: Take the Psynister's Ironman Challenge. The premise is to see how far you could go from a Level 1 character without the use of guilds, heirlooms, greens, steroids, plastic surgery, or a book deal: more Jake LaMotta than Lance Armstrong, if you will. 

Think about it: you've leveled up almost every class. You've been through old content about a dozen times. You've nerd-raged over all the other idiots in the game because you know everything. Why not really challenge your skills? Do you have what it takes?

WoW Ironman Challenge

*And like most great ideas, I will have to back-burner it for awhile; however, it is intriguing. I'm still experiencing game roid-rage.