Work it.

This may seem completely counter-intuitive to the stereotypical gamer's physique, but Mat's human has actually gotten in better health and shape since she started playing. Her friends, colleagues, and family have all asked her "What is your secret? What did you do?!" and about all she can admit is, well, she has quit drinking wine, portion control, and um...yeah. Not sure most of her friends would understand some of these healthy new habits. What the heck is a Night Elf, and why are you dancing like one?

Some rules to play by:
*Don't drink and dungeon. One time*, the human had a few cocktails, and things did not go well. Now this is the ONLY way some players do dungeons, but one of Mat's best paladin friends does not drink either, and this got her to thinking. It's one thing to knock back a few with the dwarfs in Twilight Highlands --it gives you a nice buff, and there is usually a Death Knight willing to hold your hair back if you barf--they are gentlemanly like that--but otherwise, drinking and dungeon-ing don't mix. You could get pulled over by a Stormwind guard, and there aren't enough goblin lawyers in the world to get anyone to post bail.

*When you are waiting, waiting, waiting, get off your tail and dance like a Night Elf, male or female. Both are fun and sweaty dances. Did you think I was kidding when I said that? Top Ten Things to Do While Waiting in Queue.

*Get your RL drudgery done FAST so you can play

*When snacking, eat like a gnome. Lots of fresh apples, carrots, etc. Drink plenty of water. Don't touch the mana cakes.

*Walk everywhere you can, like a lower-level toon. No level 20/40/60 speed mounts for you. Hoof it.

It's tough to look at a Draenei girl's ideal form and not feel either completely hopeless or inspired. The superhero over-articulated and idealized artistic form would look weird and maybe even kind of horrifying if it existed in the real world. Mat's human will never have a tail, hooves or horns. (She may have invisible horns when she's feeling mean, but that's another story.) Besides, she couldn't find shoes for those big hooves, and the nearest blacksmith is in the next town. But, she does have some height and the smile going for her--that's a start.

And she can rock it like a Night Elf.



*holy blog lie, Batman - was that a broad use of editorial license!?

Get up: Hey Ya-OutKast

Addendum: Fat - Violent Femmes

Addendum: Some interesting related articles:
http://www.wired.com/underwire/2007/05/sexual_dimorphi/
http://theirisnetwork.org/2007/05/26/idealizing-fantasy-bodies/