Sprite Delight...

Pleading for Taikuutta to win. Or a Gulp Froglet.

My buddy Turk had an extra Sprite the other day, and I had plans on devoting a poem to its way of just, well….making me happy. However, in the meantime, Cymre has a contest for one of her sprites she was cheerfully granted by the RNGs, and I noticed my buddy Taikuutta has several genres of poems represented! Haikus, acrostic, couplets, and hey, what's this? A LIMERICK!?

This Frolicker is not from NantucketIt will kick someone’s butt, not the bucket
In pet battles it will bring pain
And reduce its foes to a stain
But if it loses too much you just pluck it!

I wish I had an extra one to give him, these little poems are so good. But alas, I am a charity  case when it comes to pets. Wishing you luck, Taik - you have some stiff competition!

Limerick for a virgin raid...

She had no title, she had no rank
Not superior or qualified, just a rookie tank
She went to a raid
Hoping to get consecrate fire-laid
But her tail, Cho'gall just wanted to spank



My guildmaster gave "Lupe," now aka "Lucy" a shot at a raid the other night. I know...I know...you macho tanky types got it all figured out months ago. It was so much fun though. Between real life activities, and for-the-love-of-Hodir, just haven't had time to do much in terms of building strong macros, etc. But Lucy is a dedicated tank. At one point, was asked to switch into Ret spec, and to my horror, realized I didn't even have the talent tree finished. No ret gear, nothing, nada, zilch, bupkiss. Kind of like asking this:

to do this:

Choking indeed.

Oh well - no one said raising a tank girl was going to be easy.

Limerick for a fail tank

Once in a raid, there was a tank
and the big, bad monster she wanted to spank
but the tables were turned
and her fanny got burned
so she had to put her tail in a fish tank...

"Matty. That is just plain dumb."

"Well, I was going to finish it with something about a coin slot and piggy bank, but thought that was too crude, even for you."

"Dearest, try again. It has to make sense at least."

In a mean fiery dungeon she got burned
And every ounce of gold she thoroughly earned
She thought it'd be better
If she went someplace wetter
And for much bigger hammers she yearned...


"Stop. Just. Stop."

"If you insist, sir."

Unfinished limericks

There once was a priest who grabbed a girl
Using leap of faith, he gave her a whirl
But instead of a safe sin
He hooked an ugly goblin
....?


"Guarf...I can't think of the last line...face so gross, he wanted to hurl?"

"Let me think on it, lass."

"All right - see if you can finish this one:"

There once was a rogue who loved to pick locks...
In a dungeon he found a fuzzy little box
He took out his key
and slipped it in easily
....?

Guarf blushed.

"Matty.....!"

Toothpaste limerick

There once was a troll who couldn't take a hint

No matter how many times he was offered a mint

His breath was quite stanky

And made the party cranky

But the undead girl didn't give a shiznit

Lime(rick) popsicles

There once was a dispersed priest from Elwynn

Who couldn't find a dungeon to play in

She got kicked once or twice

by players not very nice

so she plagued their groins, for the win!

Bonkin' Orc noggins, all over Twilight

Smashing kegs with blessing of might,

She wasn't knocking boots

To hear the tawny owl hoots

She just wanted the rep to have a good knight!

Watching Conan O'Brien and writing

The laptop is not much good for kiting

It's missing the "a" key

So I can't go west, see

But can respond to guild-chat with smiting!