Thursday, May 23, 2013

Repurposed

I need to make this a Blog Azeroth topic, methinks.

Part I:

What junk items in game need to be repurposed for actual use?

This question was inspired by poop.


The bats who try to protect Tortos drop this. Lots and lots of this. "Guano," for the uninitiated, may sound like a laundry soap (Use Tough-Action Guano today!) or a medical condition (damn, my guano is acting up again today!), but no, it's bat poop. It does have many uses: fertilizer, and well, um, fertilizer. Cross-Dressing Rogue gave me the great idea, however, that it should be used in cooking recipes! Yes! Twenty stacks of bat guano to make Bat-Shit Crazy Cupcakes! They provide a 20-minute psychotic buff that creates berserk-like fighting, and you spout nonsensical political rhetoric to confuse your opponents. CD Rogue unkindly said they should turn one into Michelle Bachman, but I thought that wasn't fair.

So, what other junk items should be re-purposed to make wonderful buffs and spells?

Part II: Get a job, sir

If Azeroth ever virtually retires, or the races in the game need a career change, what would you see them doing?

This question was inspired by a conversation with a dear colleague yesterday morning. I was telling her that every time I call my mom, I cry. I cry because my mom always says THE ONE THING that I am feeling insecure about, worried about, or otherwise am trying to deal with, and unsuccessfully. Yesterday it was that greatest of all taboos: money. I told my friend I wish I could call on some of my Dwarf buddies in Azeroth (they love me there) to lend a hand with some gold. Man, if only. Then that sparked a thought about all the things I could see Azerothians doing way better than we limited humans.

Night Elf: please, please: massage therapists.

Goblins: everything from accountants to home repair. Whatever it takes. Just make sure they're bonded first.

Naughty children? Call a Stormwind guard. Bad drivers? Send them to Flight School with a Dwarf trainer. Milk delivery? Forsaken watchers - they're up then anyway.

I thought of so many in the wee hour of the morning when I think of these things but then need to try to snatch some sleep. OH! Insomnia? Go see a warlock or druid, of course, to put you right to sleep. (Caution: may be forever.)

If only.

7 comments:

  1. Thank God my mother doesn't do that because during the course of any conversation she repeats everything at least six times so I'd have to hear it over and over again!

    I think Cat would make a good private investigator, she could stealth around finding out all the things!

    And we really, really, need Bat-Shit Crazy Cupcakes!

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    1. I think I'll do some experimenting this weekend to see what I can contribute to the Gamer's Fridge...

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  2. I'd love to see all the grey pick pocket items reused into something fun. Maybe actual gnome effigies which run around calling people /chicken for 30 seconds when summoned.

    As for mothers, I think they're just awesome at pushing buttons. Mine is guaranteed to make me feel five years old and useless in about twenty seconds. I'd hate her for it, if I didn't know my Grandmama does the exact same to her.

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    1. I have to say, my mom doesn't mean to--but what is really both terrifying and comforting is I do the same thing: I just see what's what and often say it. Out loud. Ah well.

      Time to eat my failures in the form of bat-shit crazy cupcakes. Recipe to follow in a few days.

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  3. Well, Bat Guano is of course a necessary reagent for the D&D version of Fireball, so I can't see the stuff without thinking of Vaarsuvius the androgynous elven wizard from Order of the Stick. My WoW Mages are all glad that they don't have to carry that stuff around in order to cast *their* Fireball spells! :P

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    1. Well I'll be: http://oots.wikia.com/wiki/Vaarsuvius

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  4. As a self-respecting researching Mage now I must verify this. This is news worthy of spreading!

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