Just who do you think you are?

This is a homage to: Disguises.

Mat adores the potions, veils, disguises, and secret-identity spells in Azeroth. She can transform her 7' tall-tailed self into a gnome, ninja, and whatever suprises the Potion of Illusion delights her with; she has decided to become a master of disguise, a quick-change, shape-shifter artist. Druids can't have all the fun, you know.

Best. Drop. Ever.

As Mat longingly looks at the Arrowslinger mail leggings going for 45,000 gold on the Auction House, she really wonders if she has what it takes to compete at this level. Especially when the highlight of her day comes from a pinata-drop at Lost City: bubblegum.

There she was, just a walking down the street..

She knows, realistically, that playing the Auction House, farming for materials, and stacks of gold are just a few hours of time and effort. Time is money, friend. But as of yet, she simply cannot bring herself to spend, like a drone, that time flying around, fighting Blood Elf paladins for nodes, and unstacking and stacking mats like so many boxes in a warehouse. But with a few alts to feed, and her own gear to boost up, because she hasn't focused on making gold she has missed opportunities. It's harsh, but true. There isn't a Stormwind Credit Company (thank goodness-- she may have had to hock her jewels).

Many humans, in fact, choose jobs and careers that are borne of love, not material gain. Intangible rewards matter. And the humans who don't, well, they are certainly mucking up the works, now, aren't they? Greedy little goblins.

Well, Mat managed to snatch this pack of strawberry-banana flavored (all natural flavors, by the way, no artificial preservatives or coloring) out of the candy bag this morning. And that has given her much joy indeed.

Can't buy me love.

Never trust a Draenei girl with your wallet.

I have long spent the ill-gotten gains of Dwarf gambling winnings, my friend. (You see, there was this darling ebonsteel belt buckle at the Auction House I simply HAD to have!)

And my other friend: my rogue, the one whom you left in charge of your guild bank, is starting to get sticky-fingers. She stands there and just sighs...poison dripping from her blades...thinking..."Hmmm...he won't be back for awhile...and he did leave me the keys to the vault and a note saying 'help yourself' to the cherry grog in the fridge, didn't he? Don't mind if I do!"

I only tease because I think you both know me well enough to know that I, Mat, am actually always striving to be fair, honest, and helpful. One of the superlative nuances to the player dealings in Azeroth is the concept of give-and-take, bartering, trading, gifts, and professional courtesies. When Mat's friend took his leave, and later she shelled out much gold for dragonscale enchants for some new heroic pants, it stung financially and emotionally. She had gone with his gnome rogue to farm the scales personally - and he made the enchant with care and consideration, not to mention the aid in leveling his profession. That mutually-beneficial relationship of skills between players cannot be overstated.

My jewel-crafting skills, well, overcome me with a slight case of Shamanistic rage. All of my current epic gem recipes are for my personal use only: I cannot give a paladin tank a +67 stamina gem, nor my priest healer fan epic gem either. And, I can only use three of these gems on my own gear at any point in time. What is the use in that? But...but...but...I have two sockets on the ebonsteel belt buckle alone! Even the jewelry recipes aren't as good as what one can get from the faction's quartermasters, and the mats they require are extensive and exhaustive. They're fine for when one first turns level 85; beyond that, however, not much use. Other professions, such as Leatherworking, were provided some wonderful epic, and extremely useful, recipes and skills. All I can do is craft a lot of gems for empty sockets. "Shiny-pretty" just doesn't seem to cut it.

My cooking skills are excellent, but I feel woefully imbalanced when I offer up some skewered eel and tasty cupcakes, and you're trading an avalanche enchant. I don't like to feel indebted to anyone, but nor do I want to feel lordly either. Just know that I am as good as my word. My reputation of being an honest player is imperative. Any gift or trade we exchange is offered in friendship. And I'll leave the cherry grog alone. Promise.

But my friend, perhaps you should have changed the locks.

A Hunter's Tale: Kaylyne's Story

I am a fierce-fighting, gun-slinging, Night Elf survival hunter. My pet fox Todd is my best friend.  My name is Kaylyne and this is my story. 


My journey began in this vast expanse of Azeroth a couple of years ago. Although I didn’t start in Vanilla, I wouldn’t classify myself as a “noob," but man, I sure was when I first got started. But offered the opportunity to be “as big and bad as you want” in a virtual world, I jumped at the chance, and dove head-first into WoW. 

Hunters have been maligned throughout the game, so you may wonder, “Why make a hunter?”  Well, when I first started I didn’t even know what a druid or a paladin was, as I do now, but a hunter was familiar territory to this girl who has never played an MMORPG before. I get a gun AND a pet! How awesome is that?!

I am finding out daily how big this world really is and just how many battles there are to be fought. Strangely enough, this hunter's uncanny good looks and witty charm can’t sneak me past enemy players waiting to trap me in a hex, but that doesn’t stop me from trying! I will never be able to understand everything there is to know about this complex game, but I get closer every day. With my faithful fox by my side, we venture out each day. We are beast: with killer instincts and amazing skills, targeted for adventure.
--Kay

Emotional baggage.

Come on - admit it. Let the cat out of the bag.

In your private banks and bags, you may a few sentimental items. These are the objects or letters you just can't delete; for whatever personal reason, these items hold emotional value.

Mat has a few such items. She blushed when she admitted this to a player friend a few weeks ago; however, he confessed the same. The difference being his objects and hers were weapons, commendations, and the like; hers were some flowers, a hand-crafted item or two, and a few of the funniest or sweetest letters. (Now you might suppose that Mat's human is equally as sentimental, and on some level she is; though she has been known to bulldoze through a garage or closet, and remove clutter and junk without mercy or remorse, she has held onto a few treasures along the way, too.)

If you are the sort of player who only keeps the most pragmatic of items, you have Mat's admiration. This is a quality she will most likely never possess, the ability to streamline and focus solely on making gold and gear collecting (and again, admittedly, both worthwhile goals).

This may be a myth, but they say that a goldfish will grow to fit its pond size; and just like the items we collect, the bigger the bag, the more wiggle room we have for the emotional or entertaining items. One comment that stood out for Mat at this past year's Blizzcon was when a (female) player politely asked if, because she really enjoyed the holiday achievements, if Blizz would consider adding a holiday closet tab to the bank vaults, so she could store her items in an organized way, without taking precious space from the gold-making ones. The response was an emphatic: "This isn't World of Dresscraft!" Ouch. It isn't? If Mat took a random poll right now, right here, of how many players would like her to trash her Santa suit or pirate outfit, she imagines quite a different sentiment.

Kicked.

There's a first time for everything, and once it's happened, it's usually not the last.

Yesterday was such a mixed bag of events. For some reason, probably just a bug, Mat's Valor Points' offerings didn't reset. Sign of things to come? 

She met up with a friend in Uldum, when suddenly, the sky banged black and red...mystified, and then a flash, an epiphany: Deathwing approached! Excitedly, and impulsively (there's that word again), she flew off in a direction she thought she could find him. In literally seconds, her friend, who had wisely stay put, reports his achievement of being killed by Deathwing. Mat was still very much alive, and achievement-less. Okay. Chalk that up to just bad luck. No big deal. Sometimes the dice just get a little cool. 

But being Mat, and quite the little goal-setter achiever, (that is a title in her guild by the way, Achiever), she set her horns in place to gain an exalted rep with the Ramkahen in order to purchase a camel or two. (Another twist: she should have been more concerned with the Earthern Ring who actually has quartermaster items she can use.) Seeing that it wouldn't matter because her Valor Points weren't working anyway, she did dungeon after dungeon on normal mode; there were many fun groups, met up with a very friendly Worgen mage, and all was well, but it did require the better part of the day to get to exalted, but now exalted she is. Camels procured, without the spit option. (Wouldn't that be cool? If you're in PvP mode you could have your camel spit on enemies.)

But she digresses. 

The climax of the day is...Stonecore.

Partying up with her best friend Kay, whose peerless hunter skills, DPS rankings, (consistently over 13k-15k per encounter), their first random heroic is Stonecore. Mat is MORE than hopeful, excited, eager and ready to go. With Kay by her side, and her own DPS skills, there is every chance in the world they will get past Ozruk. All was going well. Healer levitated on the ground shakes, and even pulled Mat away from an incoming boulder with leap of faith (although unnecessary - after running that gauntlet many times, Mat has never once been hit by an incoming boulder; the shadows give away all). Tank seemed fine. After a successful bout with Slabhide, the mood shifted though, when in the corridor the tank seemed to be taking unnecessary mob risks. 

And this is the moment when Mat probably should have kept her big yap shut. 

She made a request, an exceedingly polite request, to perhaps go through this corridor a bit more slowly. 

Oh.

Duh.

It just didn't make sense to plow through mobs without a plan, even a small one. There was no marking, no call for cc, no consideration or care. Every NPC in that corridor was pulled, usually in huge packs. They were burnt down, but it just seemed like overkill of resources, mana, and cool downs. 

The moment of truth: They all faced Ozruk, and without a ready check or kiss my tail, the tank moved in. We wipe.

Again. No warning.

We wipe.

There is a word used for the "oh, s-----" moment, when the heroes realize they are in over their heads. That word is anagnorisis. It is truly a spectacular word: "[the character] discovers the true nature of his or her own situation..."

Repeat. (And for the record, Mat and Kay were the last girls standing, more than once. Tank wiped. Healer. Other DPS.)

Barely catching her wolf breath, she politely asks to wait so she can wrap a bandage around herself and get back in the ring; however, the tank was already halway down to the boss. After every fight, the tank did this, never waiting for DPS to be ready. Not a word, not a thought, nothing. (Healer was doing most of the talking anyway: offered these pieces of advice: stand out of the shatter, and for the ranged DPS, Kay, to stand next to her during the fight.)

After the fourth wipe or so, while Mat recovers her body, (she wasn't the only one), and a transition screen pops up and she finds herself back on the grassy knoll outside in Old Town where she had been talking to Kay about the JP vendor. 

Kay was there, too.

Mat asks: "Did I just get kicked out?" (She didn't even know what this looked like, she was that innocent  to this process...)

Kay: "Yes, and I decided to leave too."

Mat has never, ever, been kicked from a dungeon before. 

Vanity, thy name is Mat. Humiliation, anger, and frustration overcome an otherwise lady-like player.

Now at this point, feel sorry for Kay. In a gypsy-esque Eastern European accent, Mat lets loose a string of curses, swears, and a whole lot of bad karma blessings upon the dungeon group. For every yin there is a yang. When a Draenei sweetly says "Blessings upon your family," they can also counter it with "May your loot sour in your bags and your repair bills starve you..." 

Kay listens patiently, and calmly, ever so calmly, as only a survivor hunter can, reminding Mat that they were never going to be successful with that group, she has seen many a tank take on Ozruk just fine, and they would live to fight another day. 

Here is what Mat is now left with: grass stains on her tail, but the loyalty and honor of having an excellent friend, and a little humbling lesson in knowing she cannot fight these battles alone, nor should she want to. She will keep her own council in PUGs, and fight above rebuke. That way, if for some reason she finds herself slammed to the curb again, she will have her dignity intact.

And Kay -- thank you.

And Ozruk: Mat has some choice words for you, too.

Welcome to Noobshire: Population you.

This is not about trashing noobs. Not at all. This is about the low-risk perils of Goldshire. The other afternoon, Mataoka was peacefully watching some dueling on a grassy hillside, enjoying an early spring breeze, when she felt a little drowsy. Deciding to take a rest, she awoke to find herself on the vulgar end of a prank. Now young Night Elf hunters and rogues can test the limits of chivalry and push it well past the boundaries of the intersection of Crass and Degenerate (the unspoken crossroads of Goldshire). If the Lion's Pride Inn was truly an inn in the real world, it would be the seedy motel on Route 9 just two miles down from the 7-11 off the Interstate.

Now Mat is no snitch. She didn't summon a Stormwind guard to reprimand the blackguard in question, nor did she tattle to his GM. But a full-palmed stinging slap was certainly in order, and she's planning on TP'ing his house later. Lower-level players be cautious: if your journey crosses paths with one of these bored, restless, and immature players, don't let their gear levels or rank fool you. They would just as soon roll you over for a pack of smokes than look at you.

Pretty. Killer.

Mat is so proud -- look what her friend Kaylyne made her for her birthday! It's a Cata epic Dragonscale Tunic - this photo doesn't do it justice. It's gorgeous. Who wouldn't be more confident in this? It is by far, the most beautiful piece of gear Mat's ever owned, with bonus stats cause it was made with love. Appreciation and gratitude to her hunter friend - this means the world to Mat!

Mat rocking her Dragonscale Tunic with enchantment...

Throwing rocks at Ozruk

So...creepy. When Ozruk says, "Run away little girl..." Mat shivers...

Two days' worth of Stonecore has Mataoka bruised, battered, and broke.

She double-checks her Cataclysm dungeon achievement list one more time...and yes, she did complete all the Cata dungeons in Heroic. When did she do this one? Did she wipe? She remembers waking up in a brightly lit room with healers all around her...perhaps she must have been with a really good group early on and was resurrected. Regardless, she cannot seem to get her tail and horns hooked on Ozruk now:

http://www.wowwiki.com/Ozruk

This is no exaggeration:
Two tanks, six healers, four to six DPS's, and Mat have not been able to get past him. She has tried everything...running, hiding, moving, doing exactly what the tank tells her, crying, laughing, and putting on her Santa suit. She's geared, she's doing fine on her own DPS, but...WHY!?!?!?!

And if anyone wants to answer this call, please, for Jeeves and all that is holy, step up and show Mat what she is doing wrong...

But until someone picks up the phone, Mat will watch the post-game videos and draw some x's and o's with squiggly lines:

Did you hear the key? As long as your tank avoids dying: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TdN2c4PHWB8

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y46Bujn2WrA

Heartbroken.

Mat cries by the mailbox, broken hearted

Sometimes Mat gets a bad feeling. Maybe it comes from listening to what's not said more than to what is. There is a skip, a missed beat, in a conversation, things that are revealed later that feel...well, just not right. The feeling started last evening, with one of those "Can I tell you something?" types of conversations. Unraveling and over analyzing gets Mat no where, so she just chalked it up to just honest communication. (Postscript: That's exactly what it turned out to be -all is fine, in fact, great.)

However, lately she's been feeling that messages in bottles have come back broken. Flares have fizzled. Trying desperately not to need reassurance or be perceived as needy, she shrugged off the feeling all day. The normal Tuesday patch was something to look forward to, although it meant she wouldn't see her long-time friend in the morning. Running to the mailbox in the afternoon, she was heartbroken to find a Dear Mat letter. Well, it wasn't really a "let's just be friends" letter, but more of a "I'll be in the real world for awhile, and hope you take care..." sort of thing. Now, Mat's human understands the real world. Very much so. The human has a pretty big project to stare down the month of March, as well as attend to personal and professional projects. It was going to take some discipline and planning to include Mataoka in the plans, but big plans they are indeed. Mat wants to get into raiding, sharpen her skills, and gain respect of the Alliance of Whisperwind.

Coincidentally, while Mat's human was trying to sort out some writing questions, this article popped up:
http://wow.joystiq.com/2011/02/27/all-the-worlds-a-stage-whats-my-motivation/

Mat was in a bit of a slump there, and lack of confidence is NOT attractive. So she reflected: what is her motivation? What does she want? And the answer came to her clearly: there is no time worth spending in this world without friendship, laughter, sharing success and failures.

Mat wants to tell her friend: She will deeply, profoundly miss you while you live more in the RW than Azeroth. Her one little level 85 self was honored to know one great player who was a mage, priest, rogue, druid and the rest. Who's going to make her laugh by turning into a plant, or port her to Dal with the fastest ports ever? Who's going to give her a leap of faith when she feels hopeless? Who's going to get overly excited and toss knives like the rogue whenever he saw her? No one else. You all brought fun, gifts, talents, advice and friendship that is rarely matched in the real world. All the healing rain in the world isn't going to wash this away for awhile. Please come back when you can, and know you are in Mat's thoughts and healing wishes in realm and real time.