Good company.

Okay, here is some useful information: http://rhida.ch/2011/10/24/blizzcon-prot-paladin-recap/

Curb your consecration.

Daenys the Warrior on Bourbon Street

I don't like being the 'dumb one' sometimes. I really like knowing things, actually, or being growth-minded enough to look for answers. Occasionally, perhaps, I simply take advice without any research, and I need to find out for myself.

I was told by two respected paladins to stop using consecrate. The diminishing returns for its effectiveness do not outweigh its cost/benefit analysis of mana and damage. I moved it far, far away on the action bar, and have been focusing on other damaging tanking attributes.

Last evening, guildmate organized a few Zul runs. They went, well...okay. I still have a lot to learn, but my healer buddy said I did great, but still need some practice on J'in Do. (I had trouble keeping him just outside the bubble as I knew I was supposed to: how he kept getting in I am not sure. Think another player left a key under the mat. Blaming the mage on this one.) Guildmate very politely, (hard to read tone in party chat), says, "Um, Maty, I hate to [tell you what to do] but you really don't use consecrate enough." The response I give him is what the other paladins told me, (both long-standing members of the guild, trying to gain respect from him I guess), and his shocked reply was incredulous.

Azeroth is as dynamic as any environment. Change is constant. Keeping up with spell and skill changes is a challenge. Am I always going to be the last to know? Wonder when I'll get my geek on and say in Comic Book Guy voice, "Well, for your information, there were patch notes which you OBVIOUSLY didn't read, and you would have KNOWN about the .39% decrease in spell damage...."

To the collective WoW universe: I am putting the call out: whatever you know about using consecrate as a Protection Paladin would be most appreciated. I may be stepping in a pile of 'walked dog' on this one, but I would like your thoughts.

Going to this site for a dork like me is kind of like asking Uther himself for advice:
http://sacredduty.net/

Maybe I just better start here: http://www.wowwiki.com/Paladin_PvE_guide

That's just like, your opinion man.

 Someone's Original Artwork for Which I Cannot Find the Reference

Haven't been playing Luperci much lately. Was kind of saving myself for tonight: a guildmate scheduled painless Zul runs, because still being in PUGs with those can hurt. Besides, I need loot redemption for those damned plate shoulders I passed on last time by mistake. (*Bangs head on desk, doesn't see red Swingline stapler and it leaves a mark.*)

GM basically implied the other day I am too nice to tank. He is not. 

I am not sure the superlative 'nicest tank ever' applies to me, but perhaps lack of confidence does. So, I'll get back in there, and do my best. And try to get those shoulders: stronger ones might help me hold up those standing on them better.

Postscript: Situation: Cranky dwarf with a chip on his shoulder over his brewing techniques feels slighted. Luperci goes in there everyday to have a chat. Does fine. No one has ever died. Until this morning. Druid dies immediately. Then everyone struggles - and the priest dies next. I barely hang on and have to use LOH on COREN DIREBREW.

I don't know. Beats the sh*t out of me.

Apparently, this is an opportunity for the healer to criticize my tanking skills. "Tank didn't have on righteous fury." (I did. Didn't I? Did the buff drop off the second I went in there? Second guessing and self-doubt: worse than bosses.) Crixa still has issues.

That's right nimrods and numbnuts: I saved the day. You're welcome.

 Oh well. My shield is going to start to reflect back to you players. I honestly do not care if a DPS dies. It happens. You pull the baddies to you, think you can take them all on, and then wonder why you...can't. There are some solid reasons why there are roles, delegated responsibilities. We don't care if our DPS is highest--we are your shoulders to stand on and rock. Needed a little redemption after this, and sure enough, did great. Coren got that chipped knocked off of him in no time flat, no muss, no fuss.

On the plus side, Matty did win the Swift Ram! 

Comes with cup holders.

Warning: Zuls may cause boots inserted into fanny.*

I really, really wanted to work my way to that silly chest piece.

Last night, tried to tank a Zul with guildmates. Not too bad. But, I was tired, I mean like bone-tired and fatigued, and needed it to go fast. I see, before every wipe, (and there were a few), one guildmate typing strings of guildchat. And not just once. Many, many times. But, I don't know this guildmate that well, and wasn't in a frame of mind to ask him not to do that, but to focus on the fights. The healer was newer, too, and seems like a nice enough guy. The least this rogue could have done was perhaps, gee, dps for a bit? I bowed out, leveled up tailoring on my priest, and went to bed. No reason to make everyone feel the fatigue I was feeling, too.

Brand new day, and decide to try again with a PUG.

The rogue and shadow priest were doing about 6-9k on average, never breaking above that. We got through every boss until the last one. There were some stupid mob wipes, mostly people pulling aggro, but no matter. It happens. The rogue won the BoE ring, on a need roll, so hope he knows it is soulbound. We didn't wipe on any bosses, even though their dps was quite low. (Did I mention their dps was low?)

Healer is a little bossy. They are sometimes. But damn, I did impress myself with my skills as far as cooldowns, taunts, etc. I used Hand of Reckoning, and often, and except for the elemental shaman, I have the highest dps: granted, I didn't WANT to be the highest, but thought, how good it would be to keep everyone safe and happy.

And then the last boss.

So close to my 140 Valor Points.

If I got those points, and then perhaps ran one or two more Zuls today, I would be one week closer to that chest piece, instead of two.

But, running back, after one wipe (dps very low, healer got eaten, sigh) I stupidly, STUPIDLY, got one pixel too close to a baddie and was quickly killed.

You know what happened next.

Kicked.

Now, I realize, after I've calmed down a bit, that their frustration with me is just a case of Zul rage. I get it. And my own embarrassment and anger is due to:
1. I hate that Blizz forces us to go into that many Zuls for VP/week. I can see forcing one or even two, but to cap out heroics at 490 just seems cruel:
2. Which leads me to the fact that I just don't have the time to run that many Zuls on two characters. This is the "I am a grownup with a job, a job that pays for this silly game, am quite put out right now."
3. I think one should be immune to being kicked on a final boss. Period.
4. My friend told me that I should have chosen to kick someone earlier, that way I would have been immune -- so, in other words, become the thing I hate. Become the pendejo who kicks low dps players, become mean-spirited, callous, and smug. (Not in my nature. Not going to happen. Which is why I wouldn't have lasted one episode on 'Survivor.' I would have done that TV show just for the diet tips. Easy to lose weight when you can't crack open a coconut or spear fish.)

Which brings me full circle: I am the grown-up here.

I will not make those mistakes again, and will reflect on the things I did right, which were many. Those Zuls will become as easy for Luperci as they are now for Matty, I have no doubt.


As I dislodge the boot from my tail and put on ointment in the knife wounds in back, realizing I just need to shrug this one off. I still say running with guildmates who give a damn about me and my success would be better. Considering the four hours I ran with a guild tank the first time through, they owe me that much. No typing in guild chat. No kicking. The reward will be greater than having another guild tank on hand, at your beck and call. I'd give up my satchel of gumballs for that.


Not the first time I'll be kicked, I'm sure, nor the last. First kick stings the most, though.


*No, my NZ friend. Not that kind of fanny.

Drabble: Dazed and confused.

The sun’s rays stood strong for days facing the encroaching clouds, until this morning the fire surrounded to the water. In the Uldum heat, during this brief spell, Luperci continued her training. A twisty group of pygmies constantly shouted obscenities at them. Though she had a salty tongue herself on occasion, she knew the best way to communicate with them was with her sword and shield. Those they understood. Luperci sliced the air with her shield, a gift from her sister, imbued with her sister’s love and protection. She watched in disbelief has the shield missed targets, the clang echoed.

Postscript: I thought I was doing something wrong. And perhaps I am. Guarf asked me how I liked the new changes, but honestly, I am confused still. Too much of a rookie tank to understand the mechanics of this new role. But I have witnessed my shield "missing" again and again, flying off like a stoner's Frisbee at a dog park.

Maybe this will explain it: http://sacredduty.net/2011/08/22/the-threat-a-clysm-what-to-do-with-hit-and-expertise/

Por favor, no tire de mí agro

I am an intuitive learner, not a logical one. I sense something, and then gather evidence to support or disprove my theories. I go on hunches, and ask questions. Sometimes this makes me seem really stupid, and other times I can come off like an idiot savant.

So, took rookie tank for a few runs this morning. (Am planning another post about Matty's bad mojo night last night, where the tank was practically cooing over the new threat changes. So much so, in fact, their giddiness challenged the DK to 'unleash' and he did 25k fairly frequently. More on that later.) Little Miss Smarty-Tank still has a lot to learn. We know this. I admit it, freely. Action bars, and understanding cool-downs, taunting, hammers, nails, screwdrivers, and how not to cut off her fingers on the table saw, are all safety tips she needs to learn. In any case, ran with a guildmate, and asked another buddy to go. There was a DK, mage, and something else. Not a druid or hunter - but don't remember. In any case, DK made it very difficult for me to gather aggro/threat. In fact, they all did. We were in Vortex Pinnacle, at one of the spots where there are more than a few trash mobs. Could not, NOT get one of the damn things out of the triangle. The player was very polite, but perhaps a bit passive/aggressive when I had asked, and kept asking, not to pull aggro from me. (He spoke Spanish, by the way, and I nicely told him that those language issues were not a problem for me. Gracias. [so--how do you say, "Stop pulling aggro from me, please?"]*

And the thing is, one stupid mob pull I have done quite well on Noobalicious Tank Girl in the past resulted in a wipe. I wonder if the players will reflect on their actions, that tanks, even with--is it increased threat? No threat? I AM SO CONFUSED - changes in threat, still need to follow the tank's lead? We are still designed to take a licking and keep on ticking, aren't we?

Anyway, would someone, for the love of Theck, explain this to me?
Sacred Duty: Threat Was Good

And Bubble's has her opinion, too: http://forthebubbles.wordpress.com/2011/08/16/a-sometimes-tanks-opinion-on-threat-changes/

So, here are my intuitive thoughts:

Tanks should:

• Keep the bad things close to them and in a good position so DPS doesn't get hurt and can kill them fast
• Make sure the healer has mana, and is safe, too
• If a bad thing gets loose, get it back fast, like an underage Mclovin trying to get into a strip joint- bounce it back
• Let the group know which bad thing to kill first, or spells, or whatever
• Go fast, but don't leave good elves behind

As ignorant and noobtastic as this post is, I will graciously ask you all to cut me a break. If you knew what I was thinking about at 4:30am this morning I would have your love and support. But love only goes so far: if any of you want to respectfully explain to me anything you think you should, please. I need to pass this class.

PS For the most part, guildmates and strangers in PUGs alike have all been very encouraging and complimentary. So far, no kicks, nice feedback, and good manners. This is a social game, and usually I am just as sweet as I can be. If you're looking for a pendejo tank, you won't find it with me.

Got threat? Apparently, yes!

Does this mean you don't have to ask hunters to turn off growl anymore?

http://wow.joystiq.com/2011/08/17/wow-threat-tanking/

I am psychic: http://wowsugar.blogspot.com/2011/07/got-threat.html

Drabble: Field Test

Ren, the Druid, sweet as a spring breeze, warm, and as welcome. “Come on, Lupe! Let’s go to the Lost City! With me as your healer, you’ll be fine! Right as rain! Good as gold!” he laughed. Luperci’s horns still ached after her celebration the night before. But she had been in practice runs before – what could happen? Everything that could go wrong, did go wrong. Everything. Humiliation upon mortification, with a side of degradation, to go. The stupidest of comrades even lost faith in her, and escorted her to door, bounced her out on her tail. Painful, but necessary.

Writer's Note: Seriously, I must have left my brain in the car after errands today; however, the second run (lots of pick myself up and dust myself off time), got back on that horse and made it through the rodeo just fine.

Drabble for a tank: Ozruk

Ozruk. Head-on. Fear folded, tucked away.

“Ready?”

The gang of four standing at her side had no idea how loaded that question was. Cutting into his craggy midsection, his breath smelling of putrid talcum, like a damp baby. Hammer cracked rocks. Matty’s elements were weak. It takes too long to cut a rock with water.

Hooves, sliding, digging in, retrenching. The warlock decimated the obsidian pustules of his scaly, soulless shell. The healer kept her heart beating. The others: abandoned. Not very champion like.

“I may never be as beautiful, or as silvery-tongued as she.”

“But I brought him down.”

Luperci's first encounter sparring with Ozruk.

Wakey, wakey, eggs and bakey, Lupe!

Glad the update is taking longer than usual, (which is actually normal), because I got quite a lot done this morning: dishwasher monster vanquished, (oh, but we shall meet again, fiend!), bill-trolls packed and stamped, stuffed in the mail box, and shifted some molecules of dirt and grime to another location. However, one thing I am anxious to get started on is to inspect Little Miss Smarty Tank and get her talent tree reconfigured, glyphs ensconced, blacksmith skills polished, and mining skills strengthened. Knowing that she will be spending a lot of time in Mt. Hyjal and Vash'jir, she has her obsidium skill, but really needs her elementium and pyrite pick-ax skills, too.  Because, really, who doesn't like rainbow-colored ore? All Skittles-y and pretty. But as she sits, she is just as low-rent and scummy as any tank who will take damage for hire.

The sad thing is, the sugar-momma of the bunch, my main Mataoka, doesn't ever have enough gold on hand to support all the growing alt-mouths. She's not too proud to take welfare, but it's not offered. In Azeroth, time is money, friend, and you gotta earn it to burn it. She's thinking about reading a gold-guide, but is always a day late and dollar short, so she'll just deal with that another time. She practiced her healing arts last night in a normal-mode dungeon, and the only player who died was she when she hopped off her dragon and spasmed out, falling into the fiery crevasse off of a Grim Batol ledge. Yes. You read that right. Her over-powered guildmates are probably still shaking their heads. I am still laughing over this self-induced death. Hey, it was late, my keyboard did something goofy, stepped on a rock, sun got in my eyes, whatever. Someone save me from myself, please.

Yesterday evening, I studied a trusted friend's profile on the armory. Nice to see he hasn't been lying around, getting fat and lazy, armor plating getting a bit snug around the midsection. Inspecting other players on the armory is a socially acceptable form of flattery. In any case, again, I took notes, and am ready to mimic his configuration. The only differences between him and Luperci is she has a height advantage, but envies his red hair. It would take too much toner and bleaching to get her dark locks to look like his. She'll eventually have to find her own style. In the meantime, he is one amazing tank, a true champion of the light, and she is in his debt.

Oh, there's one more difference: he has about 150237 health: she as about 22000+/-. Better get this anemic little girl some red meat and iron.


Theme song: Good Morning dance number from Singing in the Rain. Warning: there is tap dancing.

Honeymint tea for two.

Lupe wears Matty's hand-me-downs well...

Sometimes just a change of perspective can make all the difference in the world. Leveling a tank and a healer has been revealing, enlightening, and sometimes a little embarrassing.

Luperci did two dungeon runs in Gundrak today. The first held an extremely critical, albeit monosyllabic, DK who took every opportunity to criticize, including when I asked the healer if they were "good on mana." He said, "ur not good tank ur no good."

His needling criticisms about seals, taunts, and game play finally got to me, and I told him to go love himself in a vigorous, passionate fashion and left. Apparently, his ability to taunt me was superb. I wish I hadn't lost my temper like that. As a young druid told me, that is probably what he wanted. I have no idea if the rest of the group felt that way. I needed to check his pulse for blood presence, and see if the hunter's pet had growl on. He didn't leave me any wiggle room to get my groove on. The second run was much more successful in terms of group cooperation and support. Same situations, such as the mage or rogue sometimes pulled aggro, but all in all, did what I needed to do to protect the group, take the most damage, and see it through. I love tanking. As my favorite cross-dressing rogue told me, or commented, how is it that everyone pays their game dues, and yet some people think they are entitled to perfection? No wonder why my friends who have been playing for awhile miss the days of pulling together groups to run dungeons with before dungeon finder. I don't want to play with the South Park WoW player who is flicking chips off of his belly, singularly sitting in his pool of perfection.

There is another aspect as well: the majority of my best WoW friends originated from a one-to-one interaction. A help with a quest, a passing compliment, or some such interaction is how we met, and become friends. Rogue and I were thinking that Blizzard is missing the boat on that one: how cool would it be to have two-person quests? I know there are some, and there are arenas, but I mean, true buddy-journey quests? That are challenging but doable with two? From what I understand, Diablo has these, and according to trade chat, the buzz over Diablo III is getting pretty heated. Maybe these things exist in RP realms, but I think it would be cool to be able to craft a two or three person quest chain with fabulous achievements, titles, and gold. And ponies. Don't forget the ponies.

Luperci received a beautiful black dress from her big sister. It was a gift from a priest. When she put this dress on this evening, not one but three elves danced with her, hugged her, and kissed her. She cleans up pretty good, doesn't she? Just a reminder that she's not all business, but loves to play, too.

Alt-ernatives

Lupe is no longer feeling like she can't find busfare. In fact, the royal coach took her wherever she needed to go. And there was no pumpkin surprise at the end.

Got clued in to some guild perks, PvP vendors in Dal, dungeons, dragons, and even got a few kills and achievements in battlegrounds.

And again, while there are some awkward shuffles about asking if Mat can just stay in her box for awhile, (more like, "Hey, Matty, is your sister home?") Haanta and Luperci both were asked to join the world. Wish I could clone my human self sometimes and have played both, but alas, can only inhabit one virtual world at a time.

Zep got her chance to strut her stuff last night with a silly PUG: finished Blackrock and decided to play house and musical chairs. Very funny and nice group. It can happen. Didn't want to leave, which is the sign of a great party.

Who's been sitting in my chair? Who's been eating my porridge? Druid is baby bear, of course. I play the eternal Goldilocks. Breaking and entering? Got a rap sheet a mile long.

Have a wedding to go to tomorrow: nice to get out of these jeans and T-shirts and put on something more girly-girl. And I am wearing my big-girl shoes. Gotta represent the draenei posture/height as best I can. And my friend: I'll work on getting Lupe into a few more purples and her big-girl shoes, too. As with your tank, you are a world-class healer. Made it possible for me to actually see what it's like to kill Horde in a battleground without dying immediately. And as you could tell from how many hornets' nests I like to step in, that is saying something.



Theme songs:
By the Way/RHCP

Hammer & Nails

There's an old expression: when all you've got is a hammer, every problem looks like nail. Or something like that. Luperci, of the Tanks of Little Patience guild, has made it to Level 50. I bought her a new can of armor polish and a shield, because this:

Termite Shield

...wasn't working. It's a piece of bark from one of those...dungeons...that...she hopes never to visit again.

She's been running through Blackrock Depths and Zul'Farrak. Whispering to the healer today that he was doing a great job, and the defensive healer responded by telling Luperci to shut up. Quizzical, she said, no, really, no sarcasm. The healer, lacking trust (perhaps it was because Lupe was lying face down in the mud next to a boss in Blackrock), cautiously said 'thanks.' Has it come to that? Are we all so rude to each other that when we are kind or polite our instincts are to knee-jerk a huge "ur a d*ck?" (And not a duck. Trying to keep this PG-13 people, without a lot of success.) One mistake made was when the DPS's were critiquing Lupe's play style, and someone kindly said "naw she's doing good." Why did that seem like the right time to show that she was top in DPS damage? Perhaps not the best timing. Recount = shame & sadness. Perhaps that is why when they fought the boss the DPS pulled the mob group to themselves (even though she said not to) and left her and the healer on their own to fight him. They ended up killing him anyway, even after Lupe pulled the boss to the side for a quick and easy kill. She'll watch the post-game videos later, but in all honesty, is not really sure what can be done to improve PUGs when they're that full of, um, d*cks. Except for the healer. Who later got in a fight with the hunter. /sigh

Oh well. In any case: she did get these new leggings, (Lavacrest Leggings) which are stunning:

From the trolls she got a Shriveled Troll Heart, although the hunter tried to tell her that (even though stamina and strength were its attributes), because it had a hit rating, a tank couldn't use it. Did I miss something? Luperci is going to need all that strength and stamina to make it to level 60, and then Suicide Ridge, I mean, Hellsfire Peninsula. It's an item level 49 item with strength and stamina. Hammer and nails, baby. I know hit is great for warlocks and their ilk, but was thinking it'd be pretty cool.  And her sugar momma bought her a new shield. She is covered in head-to-toe in plate armor, including heirlooms, so look out d*cks. You all look like nails now.

Three's a charm.

Luperci the Untested went from level 35 to 37 today*.  She has been in Scarlet Monastery graveyard and warrior's area a few times, and the Maraudon so much she is convinced she has a lung infection from the spores which no amount of cleanse is capable of dispelling.

But she is determined, dogged, and dedicated. The righteous will triumph. And, do not underestimate the magical power of "3"---

Door #1: Was told by a player named Junk or Punk or Gunk, something like that, that all tanks are for is "kiting."

Door #2: Was told to "range" the slimes, not melee, and healer, determined she was right, and Lupe was wrong, chose not to heal Lupe. Nada. Zilch. Hunter said he was out of arrows.

(Yes: read that right--hunter said he was out of arrows.)

Door #3: This was indeed a courageous, skillful group; intelligent, wise, strong, and fierce. They tore through Scarlet with no incident, ignorance, or insidiousness.

And, at the end, Luperci received the coveted Tabard of the Scarlet Crusade.  Her sister muse Mat has never received this, and is quite envious, but proud, too.

Luperci may have to take this to a tailor for alterations...(cough)

And already, even before level 40, Lupe has encountered more than her fair share of hyper-active shamans who are under the impression they are tanks. For this, Mataoka would like to apologize profusely; although she was never that hyper, and if asked to step back a bit, always respectfully did. Or tried to. (If you know otherwise, this would be the time to discreetly keep your mouth closed. We all alter memories a bit for mental safety!)

Luperci is really hoping, however, that the human won't see the need to change her into a male. There's enough sexism in the world, and probably even more so in Azeroth; but the world(s) need strong females, too. And if you don't think females have a strong sense of righteous fury...well, maybe you're out of arrows.

*Postscript: Reached level 40 - will be slinging shields to level 50 so she can wear her shiny plate armor - specialized style. She can wear the off-the-rack fashions now.

Let's review what paladin means:  http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/paladin