Saturday, April 9, 2011


Is there a doctor in the house?
Apparently, no.
At least not yet.

Did you hear a collective sound of "YOINK!" this afternoon, as the life drained from her raid party members?

Not that our Miss Mat is especially skilled with her DPS*, but she thought it was ether-high time to get on her restoration spec. She's played with elemental, and finds it awkward. We know she loves getting in the mud, blood and beer of enhancement DPS, but also knows that her dance card is usually pretty sparse with that spec, too. And who doesn't like a sexy nurse? (Dwarfs around Azeroth hear that like a dog whistle.)

So--she's trying to be a little less this:

And a bit more that:

This morning, when her human should have been doing other work to save her own tail and the world, she thought, "Hey, golly-gee, why don't I clean out the bags and bank?" And like finding a skirt that was two sizes too small suddenly fitting, she tries on all of her healing gear she's been hording like a crazy reality TV show psycho. Some of it was even too low level --vended it straight away. But she had some okay pieces, making it to level 346 with her bandages and antiseptic ointments. (Ointment=worst word ever.) A few gems, a few handy enchants, and voila! Said in the voice of Dr. Nick Riviera, "Hi Everybody!"  she looks herself over and thinks, "This is better than a medical degree from Undercity Medical College!" She asks a few willing cadavers, um, friends, if they'd be willing at some point in the week to be her guinea pigs to practice on in normal dungeons, etc. A resounding yes! Success! She gets to play doctor! Hooray!

And now--for the malpractice suit. And she's not sure she has the gold for the deductible. Guildmate* asks her to join a PUG raid - again, a lot of hurry up and wait -- no biggie. She warned this esteemed guildmate she was literally in her new scrubs for the first time. Ever. One fixed action bar, and few moments of review, and bam! Worse than delivering a baby in the back of a taxi cab, faster than a shark attack, the group tries twice to bring down Magmaw, and dies. Misdiagnosis, couldn't stop the bleeding, and it was all code blue and no crash cart. Watching her mana drain faster than a $6 Starbucks spilling on the truck's floor, she now understands more deeply what the issue has been with healers in Cataclysm. It can hurt.

About a week or so ago, a shaman healer was in her dungeon group. Mat stepped in something, and bam - dead. The healer said to her, "Disculpa no pude hacer nada." (Translation: "Sorry, there was nothing I could do.") Mat doesn't want to be that healer, who just gives up all hope, rips off the latex gloves and says, "Dammit, Jim, I'm a doctor!" If she's going to do this, she wants to do it right.

This may mean--sigh--going back to Tol dailies to get an epic trinket; (she's gotten all the purple gear she can from the new factions for healing), and to need roll on heroic healing gear, even if she is accused of being a ninja or misunderstood. She will research talent trees, gems, enchants, and other great healers of the realm. She may never be the cardiologist or neurosurgeon, but she will try. Funny -- her human is thinking of working on her PhD someday, but the anagnorisis of understanding how complicated healing and managing mana can be may prove more challenging.

*Getting there --she can hit some pretty damn high numbers these days, but sometimes she's a swing-and-a-miss, too.

If Elvis can be a doctor, why not Mat?
Postscript: Priest healer friend: Didn't think I could respect you any more than I did, but now I'm in awe.

Addendum: Oh -- okay:

*Players speak Spanish to Mat a lot. She is not sure why. Maybe it's the Ambassador title? No se.

(*Another blog lie -- it was the guild MASTER - who seems very cool, but not the best way to make a good impression -- kind of toilet-paper-on-show-skirt-tucked-in-pantyhose embarrassing...)

1 comment:

  1. Anonymous10.4.11

    Good luck, and if you ever need a pretty amazing resto druid to heal anything for you hit me up :).

    Sincerely, Your favorite literary term,



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